Well, really, I would like to have something positive about something I heard. Not tonight. So I am just going to write this one down because I think it has to do with weakness and maybe something more-- I think it will dig into our own hearts a bit.
I was making the frantic dash to school a few mornings ago. My windows were dangerously shrouded with frost and I was huddled in the Saturn, shaking. As I waited to turn onto Lake Michigan Drive, I heard a lady who had called into a christian radio station and she was basically saying that God told her she would have a girl and she was to name her Ambrosia. Alright, maybe it was a dream or something and I missed that part. Well, she was so sure of this she didn't care to find out if it was going to be a girl because she knew it would be. People questioned her about what she would name this child if it were a boy. "Ambrosia" was her reply.
She spoke as if she were a belligerent redneck behind the wheels of a plow and any one who questioned her would be treated as snow. Wow, isn't this just like me? (prepare for a huge digression)A lack of listening? Complete defense of myself? Worship of myself and what I take as "God's will"? Yeah. Anyway, the topic of God's will is something I feel we can all too often use as a plow of this sort. In a crass sort of way, "Get the hell out of my way, I am carrying out God's will." Ironic, eh? Maybe we can just admit that we are constantly making bad decisions and that God sanctifies us despite these, through the blood of the lamb. I do need to look to His word and learn what He asks of me (mercy, love, compassion, generosity, purity, gentleness, devotion, wisdom, etc...) So, I am wondering if anyone runs into this type of stuff? I know IRF really helped me out with a way of looking at God's will in terms of tragedy, maybe you could elaborate on that, Brother.
OK, back to the radio show. I was feeling like a judgmental jerk. Maybe this lady really did hear from God. She finished talking by saying that she did have a girl and we all know what she named her. Turns out she "is a real good kid and was the valedictorian in high school." Maybe this is where I will lose some of you, but, really? Is that what we are teaching our kids to be? Valedictorians? Maybe you, like me, are married to someone who was one or tried to be and can tell you the idolatry involved with a pursuit like that. Don't get me wrong, if it happens, it happens. But to make it your ambition to attain a goal such as that seems like "dross". I hope to encourage my children to learn.
This last part got me thinking about the weakness thing. I know I pursued grades for a few years in college and I really neglected opportunities to reach out and show love and mercy to some friends. Forgiven, but not cool. I may have looked academically strong to some, mostly to myself, but I didn't humble myself as much as I should have, stooping down to help friends in need. Maybe even offering a few more Walmart rides to my insanely patient roommate...
...and here I am. A bit exhausted and confused. Definitely feeling like a pilgrim in an unfamiliar land. Frustrated for sure about comments that really don't sound like God's love. Man, imagine busting your tail at work/school and looking awesome for your co-workers and boss, leaving your wife neglected and feeling unloved. I have been guilty of this, though, looking like a phony to my peers (Praise God for that!).
So if there are any thoughts on: weakness, God's will, marriage, balancing school/work/family, etc... please share! God be with you all and I pray we all gain a deeper understanding of the love that envelops us in Christ.
Disclaimer: Lots of this have been inspired by college students (myself included) in the past few years who have lived on the notion that college is a time to just focus on school. What if our entire lives were based on this premise?
It drives me a lil crazy when I hear about people claimg that God has told them something directly, not to mention scary. For every example like the one you gave there is a counter example from a non believer who claims the same thing but calls it mother's intuition, or something like that. I think that a lot of people want to so badly 'proove' that God exists that they develop confirmation bias in examples like this.
ReplyDeleteI hear ya, brother. Last night I talked with a friend who is part of some hip hop type church (not sure as to the denomination) but he is always saying that he hears from God and he does some pretty interesting things. I was a coward about approaching him last night, but I would like to talk to him about all of this the next time we talk. His words were sometimes connected to the Word and I thought, "Yeah, God does speak to me through His word that is tucked into my heart and mind" also, sometimes my conscience is like "dude, you need to witness to this guy" or "Brent, really, ask this person if they need some help". Maybe you can agree? But I don't have some voice from above (reminiscent of a dove?) telling me something flat out. And this can make me question my faith when others talk about charismatic gifts. But with these charismatic gifts, like my friend's "words from God" are often not rooted in the Bible and It often makes me feel like there is some sort of urinating contest going on. Still, he gives some firm and godly and encouraging words often. Any thoughts? Connections? 1 Cor. 12-14 really hammer away at tongues. But what about God's voice?
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